|Quite possibly Carrie's funniest role in which she never
spoke! Until the end she doesn't say a word, all you see
is her attempting to kill Jake and Elwood. Her ending is
one of the funniest in movie history!!
(The Mysterious Woman appears in the tunnel and begins shooting at Jake and Elwood)
Elwood: (bringing his face up from the ground) Who is that girl?
Mysterious Woman: Well, Jake… you look just fine down there: slithering in the mud like vermin.
Jake: (to Elwood) No problem.
Mysterious Woman: You’re not gonna get away from me this time!
(She shoots at them again)
Jake: (stands slowly, talking to her) It’s good to see you sweetheart!
Mysterious Woman: You contemptible pig! I remained celibate for you. I stood, at the back of a cathedral,
waiting, in celibacy, for you; with 300 friends and relatives in attendance. My uncle hired the best
Romanian caterers in the state. To obtain the seven limousines for the wedding party, my father used up
his last favor with Mad Pete Trollop. So, for me, for my mother, my grandmother, my father, my uncle, and
for the common good; I must now kill you… and your brother.
Jake: (walks towards her cautiously. She lets the gun fall into her other hand, aiming it. Falling to his
knees) Oh, please, don’t kill us!! Please, please don’t kill us!! You know I love ya, baby! I wouldn’t leave ya! It
wasn’t my fault!
Mysterious Woman: You miserable slug! You think you can talk your way out of this? You betrayed me!
Jake: No I didn’t! Honest! I-I ran outta gas. I had a flat tired. I didn’t have enough money for cab fare. My tux
didn’t come back from the cleaners. An old friend came in from outta town. Someone stole my car. There
was an earthquake! A terrible flood! Locust! It wasn’t my fault, I swear to God!!!
(Elwood hides his head as the Mysterious Woman merely stares at Jake. Finally Jake looks up and takes
off his sunglasses, displaying sweet puppy-dog eyes at her. Soon the gun drops to her side and she
Mysterious Woman: Oh Jake. Jake, honey!
(Jake stands and kisses her, dipping her like the old Clark Gable style. When he breaks away, he drops her
into the mud and looks at Elwood casually)
Jake: Let’s go.
(Elwood jumps up to follow and stops at the Mysterious Woman’s side to wave)
Elwood: Take it easy.
(The Mysterious Woman picks herself up off the ground and runs after them. She shoots at their car, but
realizing that she didn’t hit either of them, she drops the gun, knowing that she was just played… again)